Wednesday, March 20, 2013

Zoo Day

I need to tell you something but I need to whisper it so as not to jinx it, you know how that is, right? So, this sleep training thing? It's actually going ok. It might even be working and there's a good chance our night time routine is permanently changed. Dude, this is huge. Keep calm though. The universe does not like cocky. The horrible part is that separating my sleep habits from my son's really shows how messed up mine actually are. Hopefully once his are cleaned up mine will smooth out too. I go to bed anxious because I'm anticipating a bad night with the night he woke up 12 times and scared the heck out of me at least 3 of those times by already being in the room and right next to me before I knew he was there. And at 1 AM my eyes pop open and my heart starts to pound and I can't relax until 3 AM because that is traditionally his restless time and now instead of watching his bed I'm watching the door waiting for him to come in.

We're working on getting him to bed a little earlier, he's NEEDED a nap and I've been trying to do that earlier in the day too, and DH would very much like for it to be unacceptable for TB to get out of bed before 6:30 AM but I'm of the opinion if he sleeps 'til then it's a total win. We can tweak that later if it's still an issue. DH and I are night owls, always have been, so prior to this 6:30 was not our favorite time of day. We may actually have to adjust our schedule and annoying.

Since the night of 12 walk abouts in the hall, TB has only gotten up once per night to "check in." We take him to the bathroom then tuck him back in bed and leave the room. AND HE STAYS IN BED. It's a miracle. Truly. This morning he didn't come into my room until 4:20...probably because I was waiting for him until 3 AM. He's gotta have some control of the situation, right?

TB does not like this new way of doing things and he's needed some extra cuddles during the day and some space to be extra obstinate and whiny during the day but I get it and can give him that. He asks about the next bedtime as he's eating breakfast, wondering which parent will be on point that night and whether or not we are going to cuddle all night or sleep in our own rooms. I get that too. When he wakes in the night he says, "I don't want to be a-yone" and "This is hard" and sometimes his eyes water but that is becoming less the rule and more the exception. This IS hard buddy, for me too, but we can do hard things and I am so so proud of you. You are brave and I am proud of you.

Speaking of brave, I took TB to the zoo yesterday. It was a spontaneous trip. We needed out of the house. We needed to be outside and we needed to get some exercise. TB likes to look at the map and figure out where we are and where we are headed next. He wanted to eat his picnic lunch near the monkeys...well, mostly he wanted to eat his banana in front of the monkey exhibit. He thought that would be hilarious. Across from the monkeys were the Dik-Diks and he thought their name was hilarious too and must have repeated this 50 times during the day. His interest in the name was based purely on the repetitive sounds, he doesn't even know Dik vs Dick. I whisper my curse words, thank you very much. The brave part comes in when he asked, nay insisted, on riding the train. Historically he has deemed it "scary" and we've had to forgo it. (He also does not like heights, loud noises, bridges that shake, water in his eyes (unless he's the one dunking his own head in the tub after screeching at you for letting a drop get in his eye whilst washing his hair...*cough* where was I?) or carousels. We are fun at parties.) His energy level and mood were fading by then, we'd skipped nap and it was around 3 PM, but he enjoyed the train ride and mocked himself for ever thinking it was scary.

Monkeying Around


There was promise of an ice cream sandwich prior to leaving the zoo so after the train we found a couple of frozen treats and planted ourselves in the shade to eat our snack with the giraffes. There is an elevated look out point next to the giraffe exhibit; you climb up a few flights of stairs to get to an enclosed platform that allows you to be at eye level with the giraffes. TB was interested in the lookout point but wasn't sure if he wanted to climb the stairs. I shrugged it off telling him I'd go with him if he wanted me to but we didn't need to go up there to see the giraffes, we had a great view from where we were. He decided he wanted to try the stairs. He stood at the base forever watching and trying to screw up the courage to climb. He went up a couple of steps and then changed his mind and came back down. He did this a couple of times before asking me to go with him. We got up two steps and then he noticed one section of the stairs was connected by chains instead of boards and they seemed to wobble a bit when people were on them. This was unacceptable. He was indignant: "Why did they make it like that!? Why do they have to be like that?" My heart hurt for him. I offered to carry him or hold his hand. He came undone. He so wanted to be the kid that could take the wobbles in stride but just couldn't get there. He sat down on the bottom stair, crossed his arms and said, "Yeave me a-yone!" He needed to leave or go on his own terms. We did not climb the stairs that day. He will get there and I will continue to try to let him work through his fears at his own pace. Besides, we DID conquer the train, that's a big deal.

My baby.

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